Monday, August 6, 2007

Lohan's Fed Up Parents Ship Her To Sundance, Utah To Be Straightened Out By Disciplinarian Grandmother

Fed up with their daughter's relentless boozing and carousing, Lindsay Lohan's parents have shipped her to the Cirque Lodge in Sundance, Utah to dry out under the watchful eye of Lindsay's strict grandmother. Lindsay currently faces multiple charges stemming from alleged substance abuse, including two DUI charges and two charges for possession of cocaine. Lindsay's parents, at their wits' end, hope that spending time with her family's strong-willed Utahan matriarch is just what Lindsay needs to whip her into shape in time to metriculate at Vassar. Let's just hope she doesn't go down on some Mormon boy in a paddle boat and seduce her stepdad again while she's out there!

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